This photo essay brought to you by Twizzlers (now for breakfast), NyQuil (take just enough and you'll sleep a good six hours, wake up refreshed and ready to drive to the desert before dawn), Vasquez Rocks (the visitor's center has a GODDAMN FRIGHTENING RATTLESNAKE, THE RATTLE IS SO FAST IT'S A BLUR), and whatever television production crew started arriving as we were packing up to leave, the fact of which put a shit-eating grin on my face, because we spent the day taking pictures, instead of working for a living.